I walked in the door from work. There was a stack of mail on the table. The kitchen looked like it hadn't been cleaned for days. My husband was sitting on the couch with his feet up. I hate when he wears the socks with holes in them. "Hey Alex", he said. My name was Alexandria, but since the day I met him he always called me Alex. "Hi", I said with hesitation hoping for some reason he didn't notice that I had come in. I began to rummish through the stack of bills and baby magazine's I had subscribed to every month thinking I was finally bearing a child. I didn't have the heart to cancel them when I found out I wasn't. Every time I get a new magazine I throw it in the baby stash I have hiding in the closet underneath the stairs. They are too unbearable to look at. "Your mother called. She said her and the fam were coming into town for Thanksgiving." Shit! I thought. I forgot Thanksgiving was only a week away. I was so consum
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"Hey Greg, do you think you can pick up Abigail from day care today, I have a showing at five o'clock". "Yeah, I think I can do that, how long will you be?", Greg says looking out the window at the skyline of his downtown office. "Maybe you can just pick something up for dinner, I'll probably head back to the office and write up some offers after the showing", says Candace knowing it's going to be a long night. "Okay, I'll see you later babe", Greg smirks and hangs up the phone. It's 4:30 and Greg gets to the day care to pick up Abigail. "I'm here to pick up Abby", Greg says as he signs into the big black notebook at the front desk. "Good Afternoon Greg, I just saw Abby walk into her classroom, I'll go get her", the clerk can't help but smile. Greg is the epitome of tall dark and handsome. You can tell he has money when he flashes his pearly whites. "I thought Mrs. Collins ment
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Everyday on the way to work I pass this quaint little daycare. It's always glowing as I slow down in the dark and fog in those wee hours of the morning. There is always the perfect family, a young professional couple dropping their child off for a day of fun and adventure as they go to their lavish careers and big business jargon. I dream about what the little girl in the pink dress is doing all day. I wonder if her parents understand what they actually have and how many people want it. Oh how I yearn to conceive. I've been struggling for 32 months to get pregnant, every cycle trying something different, but nothing seems to stick. OPK's, lubricants, BBT's, trackers, ovulation regulators; yet still nothing. The doctors seem to have no explanation and just tell me to keep trying. My husband continues to drink because he knows nothing he can do will make me happy. I hate him for it. I hate him for not being able to give me life, but deep inside I know only the good Lord